“What if he’s trying to find his mommy and daddy?”

momandboysA couple of days ago while sitting in the carpool line at school waiting for the big sisters, the boys noticed a bug crawling on the inside of one of the car window.  They were pretty pumped making those cute boyish grunts and noises over it from their seats.   I turned around and told them to stomp it or smash it – boys like that kind of thing.  “NO!” one of them blurted out.  I figured he was having more fun torturing watching it, but I prompted again for him to stomp it or smash it.  I don’t really do bugs inside my car.  “No!” he protested again.  A second later he said this:  What if he is trying to find his mommy and daddy?

Those sweet words hit me like a ton of bricks.  It was all I could do to keep my mercy-made self in my seat and not grab that bug by its little cheeks {do bugs have cheeks?}, look him in the eye and make it my aim to help him find his mommy and daddy.

We were created to be with our mommy and daddy.  My boys have a perspective on that different from my girls and different than myself.  They probably do not remember details of their time spent in the foster care system or the dangerous events that occurred before their removal from their bio family or being shuffled around to different caretakers.  I hope they don’t.  In fact, I hope for the opposite.  I hope those memories are only seen through redemptive eyes.

My heart shifted that day in the carpool lane as I saw for the first time my boys’ understanding of their need for family…dependency.   I’m pretty sure they would not wish their perspective on anyone, but I believe their purposeful perspective will only take them closer to the heart of God.  I pray even more than their need for me or their daddy that they would know their need for God, their heavenly daddy.   They won’t always be dependent on us, however, I do pray their need for dependency would increase.  I pray it would increase and transfer to be completely, forever dependent on Father God.  I was reminded that day of my own need for my Father in Heaven.  Without him I am nothing.  Apart from him I have nothing.  I am capable of NOTHING without my Father God.  We were created to need him, to be completely forever dependent upon him.

La maison

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